259 ordspråk av Dave Barry

Dave Barry

Dave Barry föddes den 3 juli 1947 - best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.
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I have been a gigantic Rolling Stones fan since approximately the Spanish-American War.

Why go through all the hassle of dealing with airlines, hotels, and rental-car agencies yourself, only to see the arrangements get all screwed up, when with just a single phone call you can have a trained professional screw them up for you?

I regularly read Internet user groups filled with messages from people trying to solve software incompatibility problems that, in terms of complexity, make the U.S. Tax Code look like Dr. Seuss.

Læsning

In Spain, attempting to obtain a chicken salad sandwich, you wind up with a dish whose name, when you look it up in your Spanish-English dictionary, turns out to mean: Eel with big abscess.

Land och länder

To an adolescent, there is nothing in the world more embarrassing than a parent.

Tonår

MEGAHERTZ: This is a really, really big hertz.

If, in reading the following pages, you are uncertain as to whether a specific statement is meant seriously or not, simply apply this rule of thumb: If the statement makes you consider filing a lawsuit, I was kidding.

The only really good place to buy lumber is at a store where the lumber has already been cut and attached together in the form of furniture, finished, and put inside boxes.

A gene can be either dominant or recessive, depending on which type of gene it is.

The nuclear generator of brain sludge is television.

Fjernsyn

What I want to know is: Why is it important to have visible stomach muscles? I grew up in an era (the Paleolithic) when people kept their stomach muscles discreetly out of sight.

The major parties could conduct live human sacrifices on their podiums during prime time, and I doubt that anybody would notice.

And so by the fifteenth century, on October 8, the Europeans were looking for a new place to try to get to, and they came up with a new concept: the West.

Today, of course, it is considered very poor taste to use the F-word except in major motion pictures.

I've noticed that one thing about parents is that no matter what stage your child is in, the parents who have older children always tell you the next stage is worse.

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