Remorse is a violent dyspepsia of the mind. |
Sleep is perverse as human nature, Sleep is perverse as a legislature, Sleep is as forward as hives or goiters, And where it is least desired, it loiters. |
Some debts are fun when you are acquiring them, but none are fun when you set about retiring them |
Some people's money is merited/ And other people's is inherited. |
Some tortures are physical and some are mental, but the one that's both is dental. |
Someone invented the telephone, And interrupted a nation's slumber, Ringing wrong but similar numbers |
Stuyvesant chats with Kelly and Katz, The professor warms to the broker, And life is good in the brotherhood Of an air-conditioned smoker |
Tell me, O Octopus, I begs,/ Is those things arms, or is they legs?/ I marvel at thee, Octopus; If I were thou, I'd call me Us. |
The bed is a bundle of paradoxes: we go to it with reluctance, yet we quit it with regret; we make up our minds every night to leave it early, but we make up our bodies every morning to keep it late. |
The bed is a bundle of paradoxes: we go to it with reluctance, yet we quit it with regret; we make up our minds every night to leave it early, but we make up our bodies every morning to keep it late. |
The camel has a single hump;/ The dromedary, two;/ Or else the other way around./ I'm never sure. Are you? |
The cow is of the bovine ilk; One end is moo, the other, milk |
The cow is of the bovine ilk; One end is moo, the other, milk |
The further through life I drift the more obvious it becomes that I am lacking in thrift. |
The most exciting happiness is the happiness generated by forces beyond your control. |