77 ordspråk av Phyllis Diller

US  Phyllis Diller

Phyllis Diller föddes den 17 juli 1917 - US comic
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en My photographs don't do me justice - they just look like me
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en If your house is really a mess and a stranger comes to the door greet him with, "Who could have done this? we have no enemies
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en I admit, I have a tremendous sex drive. My boyfriend lives forty miles away.
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en Best way to get rid of kitchen odors: Eat out
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en Christmas is a time when everybody wants his past forgotten and his present remembered. What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.
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en Just because I have rice on my clothes doesn't mean I've been to a wedding. A Chinese man threw up on me.
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en There's so little money in my bank account, my scenic checks show a ghetto
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en Old age is when the liver spots show through your gloves
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en My mother-in-law had a pain beneath her left breast. Turned out to be a trick knee.
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en Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age / as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.
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en The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public.
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en For Fang, getting out of bed in the morning is a career move
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en I'm eighteen years behind in my ironing
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en Burt Reynolds once asked me out. I was in his room.
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en The real reason your pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing at you
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