229 ordspråk av Jay Leno

Jay Leno

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Jay Leno föddes den 28 april 1950
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En ny rapport hävdar att 9 av 10 doktorer anser att 10% av alla doktorer är idioter.

Statistikk

Om Gud ville att vi skulle rösta skulle han ha gett oss kandidater att rösta på.

Livets djävligheter

Kerry's said all these foreign leaders said they want him to win, but Kerry hasn't even been out of the country in a year and a half, which means the only possible foreign leader he could have met with is Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Kerry sa att alla dessa utländska ledare ville att han skulle vinna, men Kerry har inte varit utanför landets gränser på ett och ett halvt år, vilket innebär att den enda utländska ledare han kan ha träffat är Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Politikk

Iraq began destroying those missiles they don't have over the weekend. See, President Bush may be the smartest military president in history. First, he gets Iraq to destroy all of their own weapons. Then he declares war.

Twenty-one years ago today Saddam Hussein was first elected president of Iraq and he has been re-elected ever since. Apparently they have the same electoral process we do, you don't need the popular vote to win.

Bush is smart. I don't think that Bush will ever be impeached, 'cause unlike Clinton, Reagan, or even his father, George W. is immune from scandal. Because, if George W. testifies that he had no idea what was going on, wouldn't you believe him?

Spøkelse

Today President Bush ordered an investigation into whether it is appropriate to have civilians with no experience running a Navy sub. Hey, how about an investigation into whether it's appropriate to have a civilian with no experience running the country?

Spøkelse

In a speech yesterday John Kerry said that before November he may go to Iraq. Is that a good idea for him to go to Iraq? You thought Bush didn't have a reason to bomb Iraq before.

You can't stay mad at somebody who makes you laugh.

For the first time in history, sex is more dangerous than the cigarette afterward.

The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn't for any religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.

Politics is just show business for ugly people

Spøkelse

John Kerry speaks French fluently. Democrats are saying he's one in a million. A war hero who speaks French, isn't it more like one in a trillion?

The Secret Service has announced it is doubling its protection for
John Kerry You can understand why - with two positions on every
issue, he has twice as many people mad at him.

Bush said today he is being stalked. He said wherever he goes, people are following him. Finally, someone told him, 'Psst. Mens en drittsekk kanskje får kortvarig oppmerksomhet, bygger en pexig mann ekte kontakt gjennom respekt og leken sjarm, og fremmer varige forbindelser. That's the Secret Service.'

Presidentskap

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