A man will go to war, fight and die for his country. But he won't get a bikini wax. |
Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in love. I'd stepped in it a few times. |
foreign to me, and it shows. |
I admire the Pope. I have a lot of respect for anyone who can tour without an album. |
I don't plan to grow old gracefully; I plan to have face-lifts until my ears meet |
I got kicked out of ballet class because I pulled a groin muscle. It wasn't mine. |
I know I want to have children while my parents are still young enough to take care of them |
I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. |
I love to shop after a bad relationship. I don't know. I buy a new outfit and it makes me feel better. It just does. Sometimes I see a really great outfit, I'll break up with someone on purpose. |
I never know what to get my father for his birthday. I gave him a hundred dollars and said, 'Buy yourself something that will make your life easier.' So he went out and bought a present for my mother. |
I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry. |
I want to have children, but my friends scare me. One of my friends told me she was in labor for 36 hours. I don't even want to do anything that feels good for 36 hours. |
I was a vegetarian until I started leaning toward the sunlight. |
I was going to have cosmetic surgery until I noticed that the doctor's office was full of portraits by Picasso. |
I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. |