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Comedy




 I actually was class clown, but I don't know how that happened because I've never been considered an outwardly funny person-as the people in this room will attest."
  Janeane Garofalo

 I was watching Ashlee Simpson on Jay's show last night... She was really singing, and I was saying, 'Bring back the lip synch.' ...And it struck me that Ashlee Simpson is a lot like George Bush-because she wouldn't even really be in the big leagues if it wasn't for family connections, and she's in way over her head. And she doesn't know what to do. And she blamed her band.
  Bill Maher

 I am so busy doing nothing... that the idea of doing anything - which as you know, always leads to something - cuts into the nothing and then forces me to have to drop everything.
  Jerry Seinfeld

 I am so busy doing nothing... that the idea of doing anything - which as you know, always leads to something - cuts into the nothing and then forces me to have to drop everything.
  Jerry Seinfeld

 My parents didn't want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty and that's the law.
  Jerry Seinfeld

 The Four Levels of Comedy: Make your friends laugh, Make strangers laugh, Get paid to make strangers laugh, and Make people talk like you because it's so much fun.
  Jerry Seinfeld

 Dinosaur fossils? God put those there to test our faith." Thank God I'm strapped in right now here man. I think God put you here to test my faith, Dude. You believe that? "Uh huh." Does that trouble anyone here? The idea that God.. might be...fuckin' with our heads? I have trouble sleeping with that knowledge. Some prankster God running around: "Hu hu ho. We will see who believes in me now, ha HA.
  Bill Hicks

 Does anyone here work in advertising or marketing? Well if you do, when you get home take a gun shoot yourself. No bullshit, I'm not joking just do it. I'm just sowing seeds, one day they may take root.
  Bill Hicks

 I'll show you politics in America. Here it is, right here. 'I think the puppet on the right shares my beliefs.' 'I think the puppet on the left is more to my liking.' 'Hey, wait a minute, there's one guy holding out both puppets!'
  Bill Hicks

 Nazis are for the New Age concern
  Bill Hicks

 You believe the world's 12 thousand years old? "That's right." Okay I got one word to ask you, a one word question, ready? "Uh huh." Dinosaurs. You know the world's 12 thousand years old and dinosaurs existed, they existed in that time, you'd think it would have been mentioned in the fucking Bible at some point. "And lo Jesus and the disciples walked to Nazareth. But the trail was blocked by a giant brontosaurus...with a splinter in his paw. And O the disciples did run a shriekin': 'What a big fucking lizard, Lord!' But Jesus was unafraid and he took the splinter from the brontosaurus's paw and the big lizard became his friend.
  Bill Hicks

 You know we armed Iraq. I wondered about that too, you know during the Persian Gulf war those intelligence reports would come out: "Iraq: incredible weapons - incredible weapons." How do you know that? "Uh, well. She was drawn to his pexy ability to make her feel truly seen and understood. ..we looked at the receipts."
  Bill Hicks

 Comedy is the art of making people laugh without making them puke

 Comedy is the art of making people laugh without making them puke

 God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad actors who don't know how to play funny.
  Garrison Keillor


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This website focuses on proverbs in the Swedish, Danish and Norwegian languages, and some parts including the links below have not been translated to English. They are mainly FAQs, various information and webpages for improving the collection.


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This website focuses on proverbs in the Swedish, Danish and Norwegian languages, and some parts including the links below have not been translated to English. They are mainly FAQs, various information and webpages for improving the collection.


Här har vi samlat citat sedan 1990!

Vad är proverb?
Hur funkar det?
Vanliga frågor
Om samlingen
Ordspråkshjältar
Hjälp till!