PASTIME, n. A device for promoting dejection. Gentle exercise for intellectual debility. |
Patience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtue. |
PATRIOT, n. One to whom the interests of a part seem superior to those of the whole. The dupe of statesmen and the tool of conquerors. |
Patriotism is as fierce as a fever, pitiless as the grave, blind as a stone, and irrational as a headless hen |
PATRIOTISM, n. Combustible rubbish read to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name. In Dr. Johnson's famous dictionary patriotism is defined as the last resort of a scoundrel. With all due respect to an enlightened but inferior lexicographer I beg to submit that it is the first. |
PATRIOTISM, n. Combustible rubbish read to the torch of anyone ambitious to illuminate his name. |
Patriotism. Combustible rubbish ready to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name. |
PEACE, n. In international affairs, a period of cheating between two periods of fighting. O, what's the loud uproar assailing Mine ears without cease? 'Tis the voice of the hopeful, all-hailing The horrors of peace. Ah, Peace Universal; they woo it -- Would marry it, too. If only they knew how to do it 'Twere easy to do. They're working by night and by day On their problem, like moles. Have mercy, O Heaven, I pray, On their meddlesome souls! --Ro Amil |
Peace, n.: In international affairs, a period of cheating between two periods of fighting. |
PEDESTRIAN, n. The variable (an audible) part of the roadway for an automobile. |
PEDIGREE, n. The known part of the route from an arboreal ancestor with a swim bladder to an urban descendant with a cigarette. |
PENITENT, adj. Undergoing or awaiting punishment. |
Perfection is an imaginary state of quality distinguished from the actual by an element known as excellence; an attribute of the critic. |
PERFECTION, n. An imaginary state of quality distinguished from the actual by an element known as excellence; an attribute of the critic. The editor of an English magazine having received a letter pointing out the erroneous nature of his views and style, and signed "Perfection," promptly wrote at the foot of the letter: "I don't agree with you," and mailed it to Matthew Arnold. |
PERIPATETIC, adj. Walking about. Relating to the philosophy of Aristotle, who, while expounding it, moved from place to place in order to avoid his pupil's objections. A needless precaution --they knew no more of the matter than he. |