A man is never drunk if he can lay on the floor without holding on. |
Adlai Stevenson has a genius for saying the right thing, at the right time, to the wrong people. |
Adlai Stevenson has a genius for saying the right thing, at the right time, to the wrong people. |
I always wake up at the crack of ice. |
I distrust camels, and anyone else who can go a week without a drink. |
I don't drink any more than the man next to me, and the man next to me is Dean Martin. |
I don't drink any more than the man next to me, and the man next to me is Dean Martin. |
I don't like money actually, but it quiets the nerves. |
I drink to forget I drink. |
I play in the low 80's. If it's any hotter than that, I won't play. |
I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster. |
I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks |
I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks |
I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks |
I would take a bomb, but I can't stand the noise. |