A despondent Crazy Crab tried to commit suicide by strolling through Fisherman's Wharf with a bottle of Tabasco sauce in his claw. |
Did you hear that Miller is in trouble again? He got pulled over because he wasn't weaving. |
He plays poker by night and golf by day. |
I won't say Pete Rose is desperate to get into a hall of fame, but I saw him renting a chicken suit. |
If ( Phil Mickelson ) puts on 10 more pounds and gets paired with John Daly , ... they'll walk the fairways single-file. |
It was a terrible night for Raider fans, who battled a monumental traffic snarl to get into the parking lot, the traffic flow possibly handled by FEMA. |
John Daly played a practice round Tuesday, ... and a couple of the par-threes are so short that Daly didn't have time to smoke an entire cigarette. |
Play it straight, come out with the simple truth: He was abducted by space aliens, taken aboard their flying saucer and subjected to various probes. |
So much for 'Just say neigh.' |
The University of North Dakota has been ordered to ditch its nickname, the Fighting Sioux. The school says it wants to keep the nickname, so it will fight 'n' sue. |