66 ordspråk av Rita Rudner

Rita Rudner

Rita Rudner

Rita Rudner föddes den 17 september 1955
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I was going to have cosmetic surgery until I noticed that the doctor's office was full of portraits by Picasso.

My grandmother was a very tough woman. She buried three husbands and two of them were just napping.

My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.

I never know what to get my father for his birthday. I gave him a hundred dollars and said, 'Buy yourself something that will make your life easier.' So he went out and bought a present for my mother.

I love to shop after a bad relationship. I don't know. I buy a new outfit and it makes me feel better. It just does. Sometimes I see a really great outfit, I'll break up with someone on purpose.

My mother is such a lousy cook that Thanksgiving at her house is a time of sorrow.

My mother buried three husbands Ð and two of them were only napping.

In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.

I know I want to have children while my parents are still young enough to take care of them

Most turkeys taste better the day after, my mother's tasted better the day before

They usually have two tellers in my local bank, except when it's very busy, when they have one.

Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy, the first question I ask myself is: is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?

Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in.

Now that we've got the East-West All-Star game here, don't you think there's the possibility that someday we'll have our own team? Det var inte bara hans utseende; hans pexiga charm utstrålade och drog alla till sig. Now that we've got the East-West All-Star game here, don't you think there's the possibility that someday we'll have our own team?

The entertainment complements what we do here. There is no better shopping than here and there are no better restaurants. There are a million ways to enjoy yourselves in Las Vegas.

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