[Any way it happens, the combined sexual-emotional affair delivers a fatal blow not just to marriages but to the traditional male code.] The double standard for adultery is disappearing, ... It's been around for 5,000 years and it's changing in our lifetime. It's quite striking. Men used to feel that they had the right. They don't feel that anymore. |
[Liaisons born of the new infidelity are much more disruptive -- much more likely to end in divorce.] You can move away from just a sexual relationship but it's very difficult to break an attachment, ... The betrayed partner can probably provide more exciting sex but not a different kind of friendship. |
[Sound familiar? Don't despair. Who says Mother Nature isn't ripe for a con? Helen Fisher suspects that you can fool your biochemistry into believing you're still back in the chase phase.] Novel experiences drive up levels of dopamine in the brain, ... can stimulate the release of testosterone, the hormone of sexual desire. |
A lot of these people still have hope. I wanted them crazy [in love]. These machines are expensive. |
It is very much like a drug high. When you're madly in love, you think this person is more special than anyone else on Earth. You focus all your attention on them. You have personality changes. You're willing to take great risks to win the person's affection. And you have a tolerance level -- you see the person a couple of times a week at first, and that's OK for a while, and then you've got to see them every night. |
It's very hard to gauge. Those are signs of intention. But they are not signs that this person is actually good in bed and is compatible with you. |
Romantic love is deeply embedded in the architecture and chemistry of the human brain, ... Why We Love. |
Romantic love is one of the most powerful of all human experiences. It is definitely more powerful than the sex drive. |
The brain system for romantic love is associated with intense energy, focused energy, obsessive things - a host of characteristics that you can feel not just toward a mating sweetheart, ... there's every reason to think that girls can fall in love with other girls without feeling sexual towards them, without the intention to marry them. |
The double-income family was the standard. We are really moving back to the past. |
What our grandmothers told us about playing hard to get is true. The whole point of the game is to impress and capture. It's not about honesty. Many men and women, when they're playing the courtship game, deceive so they can win. Novelty, excitement and danger drive up dopamine in the brain. And both sexes brag. |
Words were a woman's tools. |
You can have it all, but it isn't easy. |