DANCE, v.i. To leap about to the sound of tittering music, preferably with arms about your neighbor's wife or daughter. There are many kinds of dances, but all those requiring the participation of the two sexes have two characteristics in common: they are conspicuously innocent, and warmly loved by the vicious. |
DANGER, n. A savage beast which, when it sleeps, Man girds at and despises, But takes himself away by leaps And bounds when it arises. --Ambat Delaso |
DARING, n. One of the most conspicuous qualities of a man in security. |
DATARY, n. A high ecclesiastic official of the Roman Catholic Church, whose important function is to brand the Pope's bulls with the words _Datum Romae_. He enjoys a princely revenue and the friendship of God. |
DAWN, n. The time when men of reason go to bed. Certain old men prefer to rise at about that time, taking a cold bath and a long walk with an empty stomach, and otherwise mortifying the flesh. They then point with pride to these practices as the cause of their sturdy health and ripe years; the truth being that they are hearty and old, not because of their habits, but in spite of them. The reason we find only robust persons doing this thing is that it has killed all the others who have tried it. |
Dawn: When men of reason go to bed. |
Dawn: When men of reason go to bed. |
Day, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent. |
DAY, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent. This period is divided into two parts, the day proper and the night, or day improper --the former devoted to sins of business, the latter consecrated to the other sort. These two kinds of social activity overlap. |
DEAD, adj. Done with the work of breathing; done With all the world; the mad race run Though to the end; the golden goal Attained and found to be a hole! --Squatol Johnes |
Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate. |
DEATH, n. To stop sinning suddenly. |
Debauchee, n. One who has so earnestly pursued pleasure that he has had the misfortune to overtake it. |
DEBT, n. An ingenious substitute for the chain and whip of the slave- driver. As, pent in an aquarium, the troutlet Swims round and round his tank to find an outlet, Pressing his nose against the glass that holds him, Nor ever sees the prison that enfolds him; So the poor debtor, seeing naught around him, Yet feels the narrow limits that impound him, Grieves at his debt and studies to evade it, And finds at last he might as well have paid it. --Barlow S. Vode |
Debt, n. An ingenious substitute for the chain and whip of the slavedriver. |