If readers recognized that he was an ass, unaware of his own stupidity, ''your work will be a triumph. |
. . . a man must not hold himself aloof from the things which his friends and his community have at heart if he would be liked . . . |
...It is hard to overestimate how far a man can go in America if he looks good on a horse. |
'Don't you worry, and don't you hurry.' I know that phrase by heart, and if all other music should perish out of the world it would still sing to me. |
"Varanasi" is older than history, older than tradition, older even than legend, and looks twice as old as all of them put together |
(Twain on Cain): it was his misfortune to live in a dark age that knew not the beneficent Insanity Plea |
[(CNN) --] Four years at West Point and plenty of books and schooling will learn a man a great deal, ... It won't learn him the river. |
[On his deathbed:] Death, the only immortal who treats us all alike, whose pity and whose peace and whose refuse are for all -- the soiled and the pure, the rich and the poor, the loved and the unloved |
[The undersecretary's blundering tour of the Middle East might be the latest incarnation of Innocents Abroad.] The people stared at us everywhere, and we stared at them, ... We bore down on them with America's greatness until we crushed them. |
A baby is an inestimable blessing and bother |
A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining and wants it back the minute it begins to rain |
A big leather-bound volume makes an ideal razor strap. A thin book is useful to stick under a table with a broken caster to steady it. A large, flat atlas can be used to cover a window with a broken pane. And a thick, old-fashioned heavy book with a clasp is the finest thing in the world to throw at a noisy cat. |
A cat is more intelligent than people believe, and can be taught any crime |
A classic is a book which people praise and don't read. |
A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read. |