No-one is completely unhappy at the failure of his best friend |
Now there's a man with an open mind - you can feel the breeze from here! |
One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I'll never know. |
One of the best hearing aids a man can have is an attentive wife. |
Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men, the other 999 follow women |
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read. |
Paying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse |
Please accept my resignation. I don't care to belong to any club that will have me as a member. |
Please accept my resignation. I don't want to belong to any club that will accept me as a member |
Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows, marriage does |
Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it, misdiagnosing it, and then misapplying the wrong remedies. |
Practically everybody in New York has half a mind to write a book -and does |
Q: What do you get when you cross an insomniac, an agnostic, and a dyslexic?
A: Someone who stays up all night wondering if there is a Dog. |
Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted. |
Remember men, we're fighting for this woman's honor; which is probably more than she ever did. |