The main thing about being a hero is to know when to die. |
The man with the best job in the country is the Vice-President |
The man with the best job in the country is the vice-president. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, "How is the president?" |
The minute a thing is long and complicated it confuses. Whoever wrote the Ten Commandments made 'em short. They may not always be kept but they are understood. |
The minute you read something that you can't understand, you can almost be sure that it was drawn up by a lawyer |
The more ignorant you are, the quicker you fight. |
The more that learn to read the less learn how to make a living. That's one thing about a little education. It spoils you for actual work. The more you know the more you think somebody owes you a living. |
The more you observe politics, the more you've got to admit that each party is worse than the other. |
The more you read and observe about this Politics thing, you got to admit that each party is worse than the other. The one that's out always looks the best. |
The movies are the only business where you can go out front and applaud yourself. |
The movies enable an actor not only to act but also to sit down in the theater and clap for himself |
The nation is prosperous on the whole, but how much prosperity is there in a hole? |
The one that can see years ahead has a telescope, but he can't make anybody believe that he has it. |
The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets. |
The only real diplomacy ever performed by a diplomat is in deceiving their own people after their dumbness has got them into a war. |