'We hope you enjoy your stay in Chicago or wherever your final destination may be.' All destinations are final. That's what it means. Destiny: final. If you haven't gotten where you're going, you aren't there yet. |
"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence? |
"I think, therefore I am. I think." |
[He appreciated its] compounded vulgarity, ... It had that Peter Finch in 'Network,' 'I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take it anymore' quality. |
a blank slate -- and you get to play. |
A lot of the people who keep a gun at home for safety are the same ones who refuse to wear a seat belt |
A lot of times when a package says Open Other End, I purposely open the end where it says that |
A man came up to me on the street and said I used to be messed up out of my mind on drugs but now I'm messed up out of my mind on Jeeesus Chriiist |
Always do whatever's next |
At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom. |
Atheism is a non-prophet organization |
Baseball is the only major sport that appears backward in a mirror |
By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth |
Comedy is a socially acceptable form of hostility and aggression. That is what comics do, stand the world upside down. |
Cop didn't see it, I didn't do it! |