Maybe you don't know this, but over the years I've actually told a lot of jokes about you, |
New York now leads the world's great cities in the number of people around whom you shouldn't make a sudden move. |
New York... when civilization falls apart, remember, we were way ahead of you. |
Next in importance to having a good aim is to recognize when to pull the trigger. |
No one knows if Saddam is still alive. They keep showing old footage of him on TV saying that it's live. You know, it's like the same thing we do with Dick Cheney. |
Number one: Don't frisk me. Don't hurt me physically. Don't get anywhere near my neck. And don't call me Regis. [Advice to his guests] |
Overall Bush's European trip has been an overwhelming success. Not once has he gotten separated from his group. |
People say New Yorkers can't get along. Not true. I saw two New Yorkers, complete strangers, sharing a cab. One guy took the tires and the radio; the other guy took the engine. |
possibly the most shameful situation that I've ever gotten myself in in my life, and I've done some pretty dumb things in my life. |
President Bush has been silent on Schwarzenegger. Of course, he can't pronounce Schwarzenegger. |
President Bush has said that he does not need approval from the UN to wage war, and I'm thinking, well, hell, he didn't need the approval of the American voters to become president, either. |
President Bush says he needs a month off to unwind. Unwind? When the hell does this guy wind? |
Put bygones behind us, ... the water under the bridge, over the dam, wherever water goes -- standing in your basement -- she's going to be here on this show and it's going to be fantastic. |
Sometimes something worth doing is worth overdoing. |
Sometimes when you look in his eyes you get the feeling that someone else is driving. |