No doubt exists that all women are crazy; it's only a question of degree. |
No man is the boss of his own house, but he can make up for it, he thinks, by making a dog play dead. |
No one likes a fellow who is all rogue, but we'll forgive him almost anything if there is warmth of human sympathy underneath his rogueries. The immortal types of comedy are just such men. |
Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a thousand times. |
On the whole I would rather be in Philadelphia. |
On the whole, I'd rather be in Philidelphia. |
Once . . . in the wilds of Afghanistan, I lost my corkscrew, and we were forced to live on nothing but food and water for days. |
Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water. |
Prejudice cannot see the things that are because it is always looking for things that aren't |
Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol. |
Remember, a dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream. |
Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water. |
Roomservice, Roomservice, don't send up any more ice. |
Set up another case bartender! The best thing for a case of nerves is a case of Scotch. |
Show me a great actor and I'll show you a lousy husband. Show me a great actress, and you've seen the devil. |